"Crush with Eyeliner" is a song by American rock band R.E.M., released as the fourth single from their ninth studio album, Monster (1994). Sonic Youth's Thurston Moore provides background vocals. Michael Stipe claims the song was inspired by the band New York Dolls, who, in his opinion, "knew how to exaggerate a song, to make it sound really sleazy and over the top." This was also one of the first songs that surfaced from Stipe after the writer's block that hounded him after the death of his friend, actor River Phoenix.

Released in the United Kingdom on January 23, 1995, the song reached number 23 on the UK Singles Chart. The song was issued in other territories later in the year, peaking at number four in Iceland, number 28 in Canada, and number 13 on the US Billboard Bubbling Under Hot 100. The single's video, directed by Spike Jonze, shows a group of Japanese youths dancing and miming to the track at a party, while the band are shown briefly, looking on. It is available on the music video compilation Parallel.